McState of New York Announces Sponsorship Deal With McDonald’s

OCTOBER 3, 2009 (Albany, N.Y.) – Facing sinking poll numbers, budget shortfalls, and even a Presidential rebuff, McGovernor David Paterson announced today that the McState of New York had entered into a strategic sponsorship deal with the fast food chain McDonald’s. Under the terms of the deal, the most government positions and even the sovereignty itself (formerly known as the “State” of New York), were renamed to add the distinctive McDonald’s “Mc” prefix. In addition, all signs at the McState’s borders welcoming visitors will be replaced with McDonald’s amber arches. Cafeterias in all McState office buildings and public schools will also be replaced with McDonald’s restaurants. Under the final terms of the deal, which were slightly more controversial, McDonald’s will also assume full control over the New York National Guard and McDonald’s spokesperson, Ronald McDonald, will be appointed as the McState Health Commissioner.

McGovernor Paterson’s only comment was, “I’m lovin’ it” – invoking one of McDonald’s advertising slogans. (The McGovernor’s aides indicated he was enjoying his lunch, consisting of a Supersized BigMac Value Meal, as dictated by the terms of the sponsorship agreement.)

The deal was struck through an Executive Order issued by the McGovernor as the New York McState Senate has been in a state of “low-level” civil war since early June of this year. Republican Senate Leader Dean Skelos criticized the deal, arguing that the McState could have gotten a better deal with Burger King.

A number of other states with budget problems are also considering sponsorship deals. At the end of the fiscal year, Arizona is expected to become the State of Arizona Iced Tea and Hawaii will become the Hawaiian Tropic State of Hawaii. The nation’s largest state, California, is reportedly in discussions with Quicksilver, Smoothie King, and the upcoming Michael Bay film, Transformers 3.

The prospect of sponsorship deals have also inspired turf wars between various branches of federal, state, and local government. Pennsylvania recently outlawed a deal between the City of Philadelphia and Tastykake in order to pursue its own deal with the junk food company, with Governor Ed Rendell defiantly noting that, “it is Pennsylvania that proudly holds the title of fatest state in America, not the City of Philadelphia.” The Federal Trade Commission also recently stepped in to stop Montana from renaming itself “Marlboro Country.”